Tag Archives: Pain

Dr Hill’s TED Talk

‚Äčhttps://m.youtube.com/watch?v=UEysOExcwrE

This was an amazing TED Talk, so much new information from studying ED’s. She made me cry, just knowing there are people out there learning what its really like for us.  

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She Shot Me Down Again!

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One week with her, that’s all it took to be catapulted back into the darkness and lost world I grew up in. Continue reading

A New Chapter – Single Mum With BED

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My title sounds more confident than I feel right now. It is slowly becoming more real, I am no longer part of a team at home, I am the team most of the time now. That isn’t to take anything away from my husband, he is a fantastic and living dad. Yet either way you look at it, a huge part if my life has changed… Continue reading

A Phone Call We Hope We Will Never Need To Make

Well this last few days has been a wake up call! I have never had to use the emergency services for myself,  they are for serious cases and something I do not take lightly. Yet this week, without warning, I had to make that call I never thought I would.
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If We Could Talk Like A Normal Family, I’d Like To Say…

If I could talk to you in confidence life would be much easier, if I could trust you with my fragile emotional state all would be fine. I can’t trust you, as all you will do is hurt me again. We’re not a normal family though, are we mum. Continue reading

This May Be The Biggest Thing I Have Ever Done For Myself

Starting this journey to recover from my eating disorder has been the most indepth I have ever gone into my own psyche. It has taken me through some very dark places and I have discovered so much about who I truly am and how I got here. Recently I decided to takle my biggest trigger and perhaps the nucleus of my issues. It has opened the door to lost memories and pain that have held me down. That has led to possibly the biggest change I will ever make. Continue reading

Subconscious Hauntings

I am working through the emotional turmoil of the last week. It would be safe to say I feel quite depressed at present.
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I Did It – I Confronted Them

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The day I went for my assessment was an emotional one. The fear of what may happen and general emotions of the day left me with a feeling, if I’m going to do this therapy, I need to do it wholeheartedly. That meant I had one problem I haven’t tackled…my narcasistic mother and step father.

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The Scales: Anxiety v Depression

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Today is one of the days where I am very much aware that the scales have tipped. Today’s balance is in favour of depression.
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Hollow Positives

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I managed to keep a binge at bay last night. I’m eating healthy so in that respect things are stable now. It’s taken a few weeks to reach that point again where food has less of a hold over me. Continue reading