Shaking Up The Summer Wardrobe, With A Little Help From F&F

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We can all experience struggles with clothing this time of year; be it sizes, cost, the fear of shopping in crowds or simply finding comfort in the heat! If you haven’t seen the summer F&F clothing range at Tesco yet, I’d highly recommend a look!

I bought multiple pairs of trousers!! This is completely unheard of for me when shopping outside of my ‘go to’ plus size store. I normally end up leaving with just tops and simply can’t fit into any of them or face trying on yet another pair of trousers to only end up with disappointment.

This year they have really upped thier game! Lots of choice, good sizes across the whole range and some of the most comfortable clothes I have had in years. I left with a whole bag full without breaking the bank and only one item was a top! I may hunt out a shiny sticker for myself on that score!

This summer my challenge is to be able to look in the mirror and feel good about what I have on. No clothes are going to make me instantly look smaller (I’m working on getting rid of that thought process all together) but I can choose to make choices that I feel good about.

So my usual same old outfits are getting a break and I am trying anything and everything new to see what suits me AS I AM, rather than longing for being smaller and self loathing.

Yesterday I felt good on the school run wearing my new super comfy trousers. I might give a skirt (with comfort shorts underneath) a whirl today. My wardrobe is a little hub of positivity right now and I’m loving it!

Recovery Inspirations, We All Need Them!

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Along the twists and turns of recovery I have come across many people who are sharing their story. Some are like myself, giving us a glimpse into their personal struggles of recovery and others who have completely thrown off the straight jacket of their past with eating disorders and now spend their time helping others find life beyond the despair and self hatred.

After finishing my DBT course in March I have continued to battle with good and bad weeks alongside my friends from the course. We all found not having the weekly sessions difficult to adjust to. The lack of routine and professional support really threatened to push us back to a darker place, so rather than roll over and accept that we have  chosen to keep going together.

We maintain almost daily contact with a What’s App chat, voicing our concerns and struggles when ever we need to. It helps to talk to others who not only understand but are feeling the exact same emotions. In keeping with our course, we also share articles and resources relevant to our journey together.

One particular source of inspiration for me lately, has been Anastasia Amour. If you haven’t already come across this wonderful woman and her #projectpositive work, I’d highly suggest you take a look. Right now she is my daily go to for body positive inspiration. The articles she shares are Informative, uplifting and really leave you with a sense of belonging in the world. That last point may sound a little far fetched to some but feeling on the outer circle of daily life seems to be status quo with EDs. For me personally it’s a mental line I can’t erase, I simply spend my days skipping from ‘outsider’ on one side to ‘ready to experience all I can’ on the other. Its exhausting and incredibly frustrating to battle with your own head. That’s nothing new but I am now choosing to NOT stress over it any more and try to fill my life with new experiences.

Last year I discovered my love of Death Metal and live gigs, I made new friends and carved out a completely new social circle. My most recent hobby has been researching my family tree. The high i get from finding a new link beats any ‘go to food’ high!

The binge is a hollow option for me now. Although my brain is still hardwired to think of a shopping trip when I feel stressed (or anything remotely unpleasant), I now take that as my cue to analyse what is wrong, sit with how I’m feeling and take steps to address it. I couldn’t be more grateful to the eating disorder team for teaching me this and allowing me to take control of myself again, I couldn’t have got this far without them!

Although the course has finished and we are officially discharged, there will always be a need to keep the positive influences going. That’s where people like Anastasia come in. It may be her or another person who manages to reach out to you, the important thing is to find YOUR recovery inspiration and keep moving forward.

DBT Therapy, What Is It?

http://www.recovery.org/pro/articles/is-dialectical-behavioral-therapy-effective-for-eating-disorder-treatment/

My therapy course is DBT (Dialectical Behavioural Therapy) this link will explain what that is and how it is applied to recovering from eating disorders.

2 Years & A Totally Different Person

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It feels like five minutes ago I was writing about my first year milestone, yet here I am (even a few weeks late) recording the passing of my second personal anniversary; happy, stable and binge free!
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She Shot Me Down Again!

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One week with her, that’s all it took to be catapulted back into the darkness and lost world I grew up in. Continue reading

Back After A Long Absence….

Back to blogging regularly after a long time away. Initially I was doing really well and simply didn’t have the time spare to post anything new. My social life has taken off after some effort and it was all happy and great fun. I guess you could say the high has gone and inevitably I have hit a rough patch. The binges have returned and my eating is pretty horrendous in general, skipping meals, over eating and then the out of control shoveling food.
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A New Chapter – Single Mum With BED

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My title sounds more confident than I feel right now. It is slowly becoming more real, I am no longer part of a team at home, I am the team most of the time now. That isn’t to take anything away from my husband, he is a fantastic and living dad. Yet either way you look at it, a huge part if my life has changed… Continue reading

Just don’t give a f*ck….

A good blog to follow….A lady who know what she’s taking about! she’s making her own way in the world and bringing everyone else help to find their own happiness as she goes.

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I receive anywhere between 20 and 30 messages everyday from normal people, just like you, trying to get through life; asking about what they should eat or not eat, what they should wear or not wear, should they go on the date, should they be single, should they change their job, take the meds, follow the new exercise craze…asking for my advice, my support, my words of wisdom….are you ready for my secret to life?….listen very closely…..cos here it is….

Just don’t give a f*ck….

That’s it….seriously….stop being so concerned about what others will think or need or expect….they aren’t living your life…LIVE FOR YOU!!

When was the last time you totally honestly unashamedly followed your dream?….did what you wanted when you wanted?..ran free?…

I’m not suggesting you disregard those around you and totally ignore their words of wisdom and caringness (is that even a word?!?) but i am saying…

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Considering Outing Myself – Good or Bad Idea?

From day one I have hidden who I am on here, it was essential to keep me going. Only now life is quite different, I am a long way from where I started out in January 2014. Where has that time gone? (Most likely hidden in the ups and downs of this rollercoaster journey!) Continue reading

Shit At The End Of The Tunnel

We all aim for a particular with our mental health, the light at the end of the tunnel, if you like. Only sometimes when we get there it isn’t all its cracked up to be! Continue reading