Sitting down after some pretty tiring multi tasking and having a think. For some time it has frustrated me that my lack of energy, low mood and anxiety has limited the amount of housework I do. I very rarely feel like I’m on top of things around the home anymore. I used to be and that change gets me down quite a lot. I feel it’s my job to do my share even if I’m not 100%. In all honesty my husband does about 70% lately and he works long hours too, it makes me feel lazy. ( I know I’m not but the little inner voice is never a kind one) Continue reading →
I have binging under control, I have coping mechanisms in place but what I don’t have is confidence in myself.This is something I want to change, to not care what people think or how they judge, to feel ok to stand out from the crowd. I will get there but I accept it will be a marathon, not a sprint!
Tonight is a scary one for me. I have decided to start putting photos on my blog. Not just one’s I come across, but my own work. I love photography and I love writing this blog, both of them are forms of therapy for me. So over the next few weeks (when I have the time to edit) there will be images popping up on lots of posts. They are personal to me and taken for a purpose, so where they may not be technically great, for me they say something. I’d love to have some feedback, be gentle though please:).
The image on this post probably gives an idea of how I feel posting these tonight. I feel as though I’m spinning just looking at it! I chose not to clone out the weeds, because like my writing, I’m trying to look at everything and embrace it.
The further along this journey I go, the more important it is to me, to share the experience. It’s safe to say I am behind the times with social media. The last 48 hours has been a learning curve and then some! But I can announce that I have braved the world of Twitter. I have already found so many new resources. So going forward I will make an effort to (not only learn how to be ‘down with the kids’ but also) link the two and perhaps pass these resources onto others. You can find me @FightingBED.
It was another one of those nights where neither of us could be bothered to cook.(if I’m honest there have been far too many lately! ) So we ordered Chinese. Sat waiting for it to arrive I read some comments on Facebook discussing Channel 4’s Secret Eaters. It seemed worth a watch.
Where to start…I’m currently sat at home unwell with two poorly children and I’m grinning! A little bit of a contradiction there:). I have just come online to post about the positives to have come out of my journey so far. I logged on to see that the blog has reached so many people today, in 4 different countries too, that is fantastic!
As well as recovery, I started this blog because I really feel that by talking about these problems will eventually help more people.
On an emotional front, things are a little calmer this weekend and much happier. Happiness is very much an indicator of how I eat. Although if it was always either black or white, that would be fantastic. Instead I am living with a series of complicated equations.