The next phase of my step towards treatment has been completed, a care plan has been put together after monitoring my progress. The next step is to start treatment in a few weeks.
The care plan is a guide to help keep me safe while I wait for treatment. Although I don’t feel I am doing well in any area, it was noted that I am continuing to try and get well with success (even if they are small, apparently they count).
Until treatment I will:
- Continue to blog my emotions and difficulties.
Continue to access online support / help others.
Try and eat breakfast.
Continue to periodically monitor PHQ-9 & GAD-7 scores, to help understand how I’m coping
These sound simple enough but when you feel like curling up and hiding from the world, they are enough to be getting on with. I feel like a huge failure in every aspect lately, I can only attribute this to my anxiety. When I look at what I have done I feel foolish for not acknowledging them but it all as quickly forgotten. Instead I am filled with inadequacy and thoughts of what I’m not doing. I worry constantly that everyone is user with me and just biding their time to vent this frustration, thanks for that paranoid view go to my mother and her unhealthy approach towards me:(. Shaking her off is proving more than I ever expected.